Robin…

The Bat remembers a promotion Daniel Negreanu did once upon a time where he awarded a prize to some lucky internet-er to be his protege.  The Bat imagines it was a bit like the Seinfeld episode when Kramer had an intern with all kinds of shenanigans.

Course what qualifies as shenanigans for Negreanu?  Does he make the poor kid eat his mother’s Vegan cooking?  Walk the golf course while Danny Boy is duffing it?  Write his blog posts?

The Bat could use a Robin to do just that.  The Bat would say “Write these blog posts, boy wonder,” even if the Bat can’t get no love from www.gulfcoastpoker.net.   The Bat should be top of the page.

Anyway, Danny Boy offered his liege training in poker and at any point the lucky winner would be on his way to making millions on the virtual and real felt being Danny’s boy.  Yet, we haven’t heard from any protege of Negreanu taking over the poker world.

If Kirk Morrison was, then that would have made sense, instead he was just an old friend in hiding in New Zealand.  Guy clearly had game, but after blowing up one year we haven’t heard too much from him since.  Maybe he and Danny reconnected and Kirk got some of the coaching Danny was offering to his prodigies in training.

The Bat doesn’t have a bone to pick with Negreanu, though it’s okay to pull on Superboy’s cape every now and then, and the Bat has been inspired to find his own sidekick because of kid poker.

To be eligible for this prize (and by prize the Bat means being his unpaid personal assistant) a player must be over 21, eligible to play in any casino anywhere, except for Monaco (the Bat has no interest in playing there), the boy wonder must be willing for one tournament to dress up like the boy wonder, must be able to crush online blackjack, and the Bat means crush the game, because of late the Bat likes to play blackjack online–A LOT, and the applicant… should actually be female.  Forget the boy wonder, let’s make that the girl wonder.

Okay, to review.  The girl must be able to fill out a Robin costume, and in the event she can’t find one, a cowgirls cheer-leading costume will be an acceptable substitute, the girl must be able play online blackjack really well, maybe not as well as would be necessary if it was a boy who had to play blackjack online but still crush a lot.  In return, the Bat will donate his extensive knowledge of poker infrequently.

Batman-do!

The Bat recently ran about a promotion he just missed and the Bat is awnry. Say you were stuck on a deserted island way out there past Hawaii but shy of China whatcha’ going bring?

Bat thinks about that Office Depot commercial or is Office Shack or Office Space or whatever, where the dude is stranded with a monkey and starts an internet business. The Bat would be all about that, except the monkey, unless it was name Bubbles and came with a sequined glove, then the Bat would stuff it and sell it as part of his online business.

Actually, the Bat’s business wouldn’t be some fly by night Ebay joint it would of course be the business of poker. Give the Bat a few screens, a few computers, a generator that runs on salt water, a couple of Hooters girls, and a chef and the Bat might not leave even when the air force finds him.

So the Bat reads about Poker Island and it sounds good, almost perfect. Not quite in the middle of the Pacific and not quite deserted save for some Hooters girls and the Bat’s chef but still pretty much like paradise.

The Bat is talking about one of the better promotions in online poker, the bwin Poker Island. The event just ended but the Bat is envious of the players who got the experience of a lifetime. Live players compete for a juicy prize package while staying in paradise.
The players won what exactly? They competed for a huge prize package to next year’s Aussie millions. Australia is kind of an island paradise itself, even if it is a continent, probalby with more landmass than all the islands (save Britain, Madagascar, and Greenland) put together.

Melbourne is a happening spot, the Bat would enjoy winning a prize there. Wouldn’t be so fun, if the Bat traveled all the way to Poker Island to win a package to Atlantic City.

The Poker Island players, winners from across the globe, played around the clock poker games. Sounds like a reality show, don’t it, kind of like Gilligan’s Island meets the World Series of Poker. For one month these guys had to tolerate paradise matching wits, from June 15th to July 14th.

All it took for those lucky castaways, on their fateful trip to get to poker island was to win a couple of online poker tournaments. Like any good poker promotion it starts below the micro steps with a freeroll being option number one.

Unfortunately, this years qualifers are over, (www.bwin.com/pokerisland) completed June 23rd. However, that’s not going to keep the Bat from waiting for U.I.E.G.A to get turned over and to make an island cruise next year.

Each week a champion was crowned and then at the grand final, July 14th, each of the weekly champions battled one another. The guy who was living most large was the champion of the grand final who won the VIP Package for the “Aussie Millions 2010” poker tournament. Value: $25,000. To get a better idea of what’s going on at poker’s paradise island visit: poker island right now.

Darvin Moon

The Bat loves the Moon.  The Bat’s favorite things happen under the moon, and loves mooning.  How many school buses did the Bat ride as a kid that got a red-eye out the window for those early morning commuters.  It’s like a doggie’s hello.  Smell my butt, good to see you.

Right now, Darvin Moon is crushing the Main Event.  The Bat thinks the pressure of holding onto the massive chip  lead through November will be too much for Moon but the Bat hopes not.  He certainly looks like he’d need a lesson on how to play poker and when you check his stats you see there are many Moons ahead of him in cashes (though not true anymore as every November Niner gets ninth place money in advance of the tournament).

How can you not love the guy, he’s wearing a Saints hat for Peter’s sake.   He gets it, he is an underdog one of Moneymaker type proportions.   Moon is a logger, which is a bit like deciding to bungee jump for a career–with an axe.   It’s one of the most dangerous professions there is, so maybe all this poker pressure ain’t much to the guy.

It’s a dangerous game the world series plays staving off the final table of the tournament until November.  What if somebody has a nasty fall, loses all his potential winnings (it’s possible for a degenerate to get that deep in the tournament)  or worse yet kicks it.  What happenens then?

Would they blind off his chips for heir?  Would they rethink this massive break happening in the middle of their world championship?  In some ways, this break is terrible.  For a guy like Moon, he’s going to have endure something Chris Moneymaker never had to.

One night Moneymaker went to bed thinking “I can’t believe I made the final table,” the next day a giddy player wins it.  There are no hanger-ons, no bad influences steering him in the wrong direction.  Suddenly, a guy like Moon wakes up and basks in the enormity of the moment.  His television appearences will start airing and he’ll perhaps start to believe that the moment and the stage is too big for a logger.

It’ll be a tough road for Moon to manage.  Dennis Phillips donked off most of his chips early after driving the same route, but managed a comeback and slavaged third place.  We’ll have to hurry up and wait to see how Moon handles things.

The Bat just got deep.  Won’t happen again.  That’s funny the Bat getting deep in a tournament or in mindset.  Sorry.

The Bat Attack

The Bat is back.  He’s not listening to Gwen Stefani but there is No Doubt the Bat will bring it today.

First order of business…  Who is this Jeffrey Lisandro fella?  Three bracelets in one year.  Doesn’t he know that’s a record?  Why would the guy, who was accused of stealing antes, and of wearing a bad hat and worse shirt, suddenly dominate the poker world?  The Bat don’t know, but Barry Greenstein did.

Ol’ Barry signed up Lisandro, we are guessing he tried to enlist Phil Ivy but was declined by his opponents, for a prop bet with Daniel Negreanu and Eric Lindgren.  Now, Lisandro is strutting his way to one of the best world series ever and Negreanu is making blogs that sound more and more like Phil Hellmuth than likable Danny Boy.  Greenstein and Lisandro breezing their way to a prop bet bonanza.

Second order of business, ever been on the business end of loaded weapon, if so you know what it means to be talking serious business, it’s business time, and business time refers to the questionable handling of the Horse Tournament.  It’s a danged shame.  As for Ville Wahlbeck and Vitaly Lunkin taking over the poker world the Bat just hopes they don’t sing.  The Bat is still recovering from a couple of world beaters from Europe that did sing:

“Poker, Poker, Poker, Every one plays Poker,” thanks Marcel.

Third order of business is online poker.  The Bat loves it again.  Running KK into AA and winning three straight times.  Yeah, the Bat is that guy.  He’s the dude you hate.   

Fourth order of business.  Really, why are those guys singing? 

Fifth order of business is dispensing with this order of business stuff.  The Bat is excited that the powers that be at ESPN decided a charity poker tournament would have more drama than a real poker tournament.  Guess they didn’t notice that bravo which barely outdraws a local access show buried the Celebrity Poker show and canceled it.

 Back to online poker, the Bat enjoys playing it on a mac.  It’s still somewhat hard to come by, mac poker, that is, so the Bat encourages all you fellow iPhreaks to join him in a game of “poker, poker, poker.”  Just don’t get mad when your aces can’t withstand the Bat’s kings.