Christmas is one of the Bat’s favorite holidays it’s right up there with Halloween and eating gobs of candy, with Thanksgiving eating gobs of Turkey, and Valentine’s Day eating gobs of chocolate. Course the Bat likes to fry a christmas goose. Tip one for frying your own goose. Like Duck, Goose is a meat best eaten rare or medium rare.
It’s a tasty bird, a tasty, tasty bird. During the holidays while the Bat is ready to cook his goose, the Bat plays some online poker tournaments. The Bat kills online poker, KILLS it. At least of late. The Bat’s favorite game is playing six handed.
After the Bat turns the crank on the old Commodore 64 to get it up and running he turns to his mac and plays some real poker. The Commodore 64 is like the world’s biggest paperweight. Though the Bat is a bit of nostalgist. Anyway, the Bat digresses. When the Bat sits down to play poker online, the Bat is fully aware he’s going to kill it.
Depending on the site, the Bat has careful notes about all of his opponents. At least the Bat did until he heard so called Data Mining is illegal. The first thing the Bat did was shred all the paper evidence of the data mining, then the Bat emailed his friends and told them to not do it, and then the Bat took a big magnet to his computer to clear any evidence… um… data that might have been mined.
The Bat can’t believe this Isildur1 vs. Brian Hastings vs. the online poker player’s world. What? Isildur1 ran over the likes of Tom Dwan and then some geeks from Card Runners pooled their data and crushed the kid. Didn’t they send Durrrr the memo? And then what? The guy that won most of the money, over 4 million, mr. Brian Hastings, promptly thanks er… rat’s out… Brian Townsend.
Townsend was the mastermind. He’s the goose that needs to be cooked. Hastings slyly implied when he gave full thanks to his windfall to Townsend. All that did was get Townsend’s red pro status revoked. But wait their’s more…
Isildur1, who’s own goose was cooked when he saw all his nosebleed winnings head over to Hastings account, read about the collusion… er… data mining and he’s not too pleased. The Bat should think not. Why would he be? The kid only took the nosebleed stratosphere by storm playing every single big name at once it seemed. And for the most part winning. Then some guys who wouldn’t last long enough in a dodge ball game to be second man out sat around their laptops, spreadsheets, and slide rulers devising a strategy to top him.
ONE PER HAND!
The Bat’s not sure what to think. Data mining seems to be here to stay. Sure it’s frowned upon but is it really? Brian Townsend at most got a slap on the wrist and the other two seem to be getting away scott free. What if Isildur1’s protest gets honored. What player wouldn’t start accusing every successful opponent of being a lowly, black-tarred data miner?
The Bat knows he would point the sooty feather at many an opponent. When the Bat sits down to play poker online he does so to compete against one man for each hand. So what if the Bat has data on all his opponents it’s not fair if they have data on the Bat. Plus, there are several sessions the Bat would like to do-over. Perhaps, his site can launch an investigation into the freaks that rivered quads against the Bat. Or the guy that called every bet that one day.
Anyway, the Bat scooped exactly 4 tournaments out of the 10 he played this week. That’s pretty phenomenal. Next stop Isildur1 and that gang of data miners.
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